Why do I feel bad during prayer?

There is a prayer called (Shemonah Esrei meaning 18 prayers) said three time daily in the Jewish prayers, though there is actually 19, it is said silently while standing.

 

I heard a story; a man remembered during such a prayer that all his debts that he wasn’t able to pay.  He got worried and asked the Rav what he should do.  The Rav answered; don’t worry you have plenty time to pay them off; you owe a non-Jew; he doesn’t have the prayers to say every day.  What’s the connection? It is very hard to stay focus during the quiet recitation; so everyone remembers all the other things in their lives.  But the Non-Jew doesn’t have such distractions; he won’t remember so fast.

 

Prayer demands focus and concentration – so either you are dozing off and not getting the benefits.  Or you are too focus on your own faults and don’t see a way out of your mistakes.  Prayer is for recognizing G-d who demands much from you, but He is also merciful and expects you to improve slowly.

 

Prayer is good.  You can pray to feel better about praying.  You can pray for anything – nothing is too hard or small for G-d. And he unlike humans, G-d likes to be asked again and again.

 

Take one prayer, understand and say it with the most conviction you can and don’t worry about the rest.  Make it your prayer and you will start feeling better about it all.

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