A BT’s Wedding Prep

Sara dialed her mother’s number again, and this time, she took a deep breath and waited for her to answer.

 “Hi, Mom.  I need to ask a few things about the wedding. “

“Do we have to start a conversation right away with an argument; especially when you are so far away?” her mother already feeling burdened by the strange wedding her daughter was planning, answered a little too quickly.

“I’m sorry that my wedding is so hard for you to talk about,” Sara held back the tears and tried to keep a calm voice.

“Believe me, dear, I am very excited for you and happy that you are going to have the wedding near home so I can have all my friends (who you grew up with, know you and care so much about you). You just have asked for a lot of changes.  I mean, why do we need a- what did you call it mechitza? You think my friends are going to dance separately from their husbands?  Listen it is all very nice that you want an orthodox wedding, but don’t forget who is paying for this event.”

 “Mom, I really appreciate that you and Dad are willing to pay for the wedding, but it needs to be comfortable for Yaacov and me.”

“Yaacov? Oh, Jason.  I keep forgetting his new name.  And what about our comfort? And the comfort of our guests, and our older relatives?  First, you needed it to be kosher, fine, even if it is more money. Then you want some crazy band to come from New York City when your brother would be willing to bring his friends to play. They make a very nice band, especially with that lovely girl with such a beautiful voice. Why you need some unknown band just because they are an-all-man-band, I don’t get it.  What ever happen to your feminist side?  And now you want the dancing to be separate behind a tent!  This is what those Rabbis of yours demand?  “

 “Mom, I know it is a lot of changes.  I remember you told me that you didn’t like your wedding. Your mother insisted on what dress you were going to where, the place, the day. She even didn’t let you sleep in your own bed the night before because she had so many guests.  Everything was for everyone else.  I really appreciate that you are trying to let me have it my way.”

“Yeah, but your way was the way my mother wanted it for me.  In a hotel.  With some old Orthodox rabbi who doesn’t even know English!”


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